Posted in Parenting, Personal, social media

The Power of Social Media

Hello everyone, I hope all is well with you. I’m back today after Mother’s Day and a busy week at work and a week of running. I didn’t write much this last week because I’m still noodling over my story, and I’ve been busy with other things. My oldest will walk in his graduation ceremony tomorrow. I’m so excited for him as he starts this new chapter in his life. I’m also sad. I told my hubby it’s time to have another baby. Let’s just say, I freaked him out…a little. 😉

But enough about that, today I’d like to talk about something I’ve noticed on social media. It’s nothing new. People taking selfies and posting them on Facebook or Instagram that’s the norm these days. What I’m beginning to suspect is that people are doing certain activities just to post them on social media.

This has me worried. What kind of connections do we really have if we’re engaging in activities just to create an image on the internet? Our focus should be on improving our relationships and staying in the present moment.

I use Facebook to connect with friends I haven’t seen in a while or that live far away and to market my books. I know. I was one of those authors. Heavy sigh. In my defense, I knew nothing about marketing on Facebook and that’s all I’m going to say about that. LOL.

So many people including our next generation are using social media to sell the idea of themselves whether it’s true or not. Don’t you see where this could be a little confusing for them?

For example, let’s say they post an image of them baking. What if they want to be a master chef? What happens if they don’t get many likes? Will they stop pursuing that dream because it wasn’t popular with their followers?

Now, I know this is an extreme example, but it sure does make you think, doesn’t it?

Is social media going to dictate what goals our next generation pursues based on likes? Right now, this is the power of social media. This power is in its infancy, but it’s there lurking below the surface. I say this because social media’s sole purpose is to keep the user engaged, using any means necessary. That means it will post pictures and articles in your feed to keep you scrolling. They’ve gathered all this information based on what images you interact with on social media.

So, it’s not such a stretch that it could influence our behavior if we’re not careful. So, instead of taking pictures for selfies to post, let’s stay present with our families and friends. Let’s show our kids what a real connection is.  We do this by engaging in activities we actually enjoy and spending time with people we enjoy as well. Let’s show our kids that’s where true happiness lies not on Fakebook posting selfies of what we think our friends and followers will like.

How about you? How do you connect with people you love? Leave a comment! I’d love to hear from you!

Posted in Parenting, Personal

Letting Go in a Dangerous World

Hello everyone, I hope all is well with you. It has been a busy week with work and writing. I’m still noodling about my story. I have to decide which way I want to go before I put all the pieces together, but I’m getting there. Winter has finally left us. My tulips have finally started to bloom. It’s good to get outside and feel the warm air, but enough about that.

 Today, I’d like to talk about letting go. Something I wasn’t prepared to do. I don’t know if any parent is prepared for this, but right before my eyes my boys have grown up. They don’t need me to tie their shoes or kiss their wounds any longer. It’s hard to let go.

I wasn’t ready for this. My oldest is going to college soon and I worry. What if a mass shooter comes to his school and shoots it up? What if someone tries to blackmail him on social media? What if someone slips some drugs into his drink when he isn’t looking? The world is such a dangerous place right now.

How can I make my boys understand the danger? How do I teach them to protect themselves? How do I teach them to be vigilant and look for danger before it finds them?

These are the questions I ask myself. Because when I raised them, I focused on teaching them how to be a good person and a good friend. I taught them to follow the rules, but now the world is full of people who don’t follow the rules. How do I protect them from those people?

There was a school shooting in Oxford Michigan a year and a half ago, and the parents have been arrested and charged as well because they knew of their son’s fragile mental condition and did nothing. They bought the gun for him. How do I protect my kids from these people?

My first thought is to teach them to defend themselves. But how can they defend themselves from a mass shooter? Do I give them both a gun?

Does anyone else see where this is going? If we don’t do something soon this problem is going to get worse. We need to look at countries that don’t have a mass shooter problem and emulate them until we come up with something better. We need to nip this in the bud.

I say we look at Canada and emulate their gun control laws then maybe I wouldn’t be so afraid to let go. Maybe I could enjoy watching my boys bloom.

Protecting them from the real threats on social media is a little easier. They still listen to me (Thank God) and right now, they’re not active on the popular sites, but it’s only a matter of time. I feel less worried about this one because my kids’ school has been very good at communicating the dangers of social media to their students. Hopefully, these lessons will stick.

These are some solutions to some very dangerous problems. How about you? Do you have any ideas on how to protect our kids from the threats that are out there? Leave a comment! I’d love to hear from you!

Posted in Writing

How to Quiet That Inner Critic

Hello everyone, I hope all is well with you. I’m back after a week of work, writing, and reading. I’ve also been running. It helps me manage my weight and my stress. During the winter months, I found a gym with an indoor track that allowed me to run inside, so I was able to maintain my running schedule. But enough about me, today I’d like to talk about dealing with our inner critic.

We’ve all got one, that nagging voice inside our heads that whispers, “You’re not good enough.” Sometimes we can beat that voice into a bloody pulp, but other times that voice cripples us. Where did this voice come from? I have a theory. It’s the voice of your most negative parent.

I find this voice doesn’t always whisper. I can feel it ramping up my anxiety when I’m writing. It takes a lot of energy to still this voice in my head, but I’ve learned some techniques that help me, and I thought I’d share them with the rest of the creatives out there who’re trying to get your work out into the world.

The first thing I do when I feel that old anxiety creeping through my body tensing my muscles and stealing my good mood is, I remind myself that I’m trying to break into a tough business. Writing and publishing is tough right now. It’s not a walk in the park. I’m trying to do something that’s extremely hard.

Then I make sure and manage my stress. I go for a walk, run, or hike. Physical activity is a great way to get those endorphins flowing, and those endorphins drown out that nagging voice in my head. I bet it will work for you, too.

Another way I quiet that voice is I get together with other creatives. We all need the support of our creative family.  People who believe in us and cheer us on. When that inner critic gets too loud, I hang out with my fellow creatives, and it does wonders for my motivation and drive.

Another way I quiet that voice is I take a break. Sometimes we’ve been working so hard on a project that we become over correctors, and you can’t tell if what you’ve written is gold or dribble. That’s when I take a break and put the story out of my head. Sometimes we just need to get away from it for a little while.

Sometimes I read when I take a break or watch a movie. Something that takes my mind off the story and allows me to relax. Other times, I’ll hike through the woods or walk along the beach. Whatever I feel I need at the time.

So, there you have it. Some ways I squash that inner critic. How about you? How do you quiet that negative Nancy raging through your head? Leave a comment! I’d love to hear from you!

Posted in Health, hiking, mental-health, Personal

The Great Outdoors, It’s Good for You!

Hello everyone, I hope all is well with you. I’m back today after a week of work and writing. We had some warm days last week which I am grateful for, but I’m ready for more. I’m ready for summer. Those consistently hot days when all I want to do is read in the shade while listening to the waves rolling in and crashing on the shore.

This summer, I plan to get out into nature more. I’m going to make a concerted effort to get to the lakeshore and see more sunsets and walk along the beach. I’m also planning on doing more hiking.

Getting outside is good for our mind and body. Hiking in the woods is a great way to relieve stress after a busy day at work. It’s good for our immune system, too. The trees release phytoncides. These compounds are anti-fungal microbes that defend the trees from fungus, bacteria, and even animals. By breathing them in they help our immune system as well by telling worn out cells it’s time to go. No wonder I always feel better after a hike through the woods.

Walking by the water is also beneficial. Something about the calming sound of the waves against the shore seems to unravel the tension inside of me. Walking in the sand barefoot has two benefits. It’s a great source of exercise for your leg muscles, and it’s a form of earthing or grounding.

Grounding is a way of transferring the earth’s electrons to our bodies. It’s accomplished by walking barefoot on the earth or by digging around in the soil. For example, planting a garden or flowers.  This transfer of energy is an anti-inflammatory and an antioxidant according to experts. Inflammation is a common denominator in many life-threatening diseases. Just think by grounding twenty minutes a day, you reduce your risk of heart disease and cancer.

Let’s not forget the sun. We get vitamin D from the sun. This vitamin is essential for strong bones. It helps them absorb calcium which makes them stronger. Are you seeing a theme here?

Do you remember when you were a kid, and you’d spend the whole day outside riding your bike and playing near the water? We were doing more for our health than we realized. I plan on spending more time outdoors this summer. I hope you can, too. What are some of the outdoor activities you enjoy? Leave a comment! I’d love to hear from you!

Posted in environment, Personal

Save the Bees!

Hello everyone, I hope all is well with you. I’m back today after a week of working and writing. I’m making progress on my story, and I’m excited about it. But enough about that.

This week the weather was spectacular. I ran outside a couple of times and I’m definitely in the mood for summer. My tulips are coming up this year. They didn’t last year, I’m not sure why. I wasn’t expecting them this year, but low and behold there they are.

Which brings me to my topic for today. We need to take special care of our bees and other pollinators. They are vital to the survival of trees and flowers on our planet. According to reports, the honeybee population has declined by 89% and is on the verge of extinction.

There are a variety of factors contributing to this decline, climate change, pesticides, declining habitat, and disease.  The honeybee is a critical link to our agriculture. They are the pollinators that keep our flowers growing as well as a variety of food staples we humans eat. I find it ironic that such a tiny insect has such an impact on our earth.

We humans have to wake up and save the bees. If we don’t, and they do go extinct, our supply of fruit and vegetables will be substantially reduced. According to Einstein, we could survive maybe four years without bees. That is a scary thought.

So, what can we do to save them? Stop using pesticides. Plant flowers for food for them. The bottom line is we need bees to maintain the quality of life we’ve all enjoyed. Now it’s time to step up to the plate and make sure we can sustain it. We need to do this not just for ourselves but for future generations too.

We need to do something now. Don’t you agree?

Thanks for stopping by and reading my post. How about you? Do you have any ideas on how to save the bees? Leave a comment! I’d love to hear from you!

Posted in reviews

Movie Review: The Whale

Hello everyone, I hope all is well with you. I’m back today after a week of work and writing and chilly weather. We had another school shooting in Tennessee, but I didn’t want to write about that today because it upset me, and I’d just be repeating myself anyway. I wanted to write about something a little more thought provoking. It was wet and rainy on Friday the 31st so I hunkered down and watched another great movie.

I watched the movie “Whale.” I wanted to see why Brendan Fraser received the Oscar for that movie, and after watching it, he definitely deserved it. It’s the heartbreaking story of an obese man. We get to see why he’s obese. Why he let himself get that way.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nWiQodhMvz4

Click the link above to watch the trailer.

It’s a story about heartbreak, and it’s a good lesson in giving grace to people. We don’t know their stories. In the movie, Charlie (the main character) falls in love with another man. He leaves his wife and daughter for this man. His name is Alan.

The Whale, Movie Review: The Whale, Brendan Fraser, Lisa Orchard

There’s a bitter custody battle over the daughter that he loses. As a consequence, he hasn’t seen his daughter in nine years. He regrets leaving her and would like to reconnect. He offers her all the money in his bank account if she’ll spend time with him. She wants the money, so she agrees.

We learn that Alan committed suicide and Charlie has never gotten over that loss. Alan’s father was a religious man who could not accept his homosexual son. So, he kicked Alan out of the church and the family. Alan also has guilt over being gay and grappled with this because he felt it was against his religion. The only way he could deal with it was to jump off a bridge.

There are many messages in this movie, but the biggest one is acceptance. If parents could accept their children as they are we’d have less suicides. If society could learn to accept differences there’d be less strife in the world.

This was an amazing movie, and it moved me to tears. My oldest happened to enter the room when I was watching it, and he sat down and watched it with me. That made me happy. I wanted him to see that everyone has a story, and everyone deserves grace even if we’re disgusted by them.

Thanks for reading my post. I encourage you to see this movie. It was very well done, and Brendan Fraser did an excellent job. It opens your eyes to the bigger picture. How about you, have you seen a movie recently that affected you this way? Leave a comment! I’d love to hear from you!