I saw this on Facebook, and it made me think. I thought maybe this would resonate with some of you parents as well.
Wednesday Wisdom
Tag: Lisa Orchard
Pursue your Joy
Hello everyone, I hope all is well with you. I’m back today after a week of work and writing. I’ve made some headway on my story and I’m loving where this is going. Hopefully, this is the one.
But enough about that, today I’d like to talk about doing what brings you joy. Many people grow up believing there’s a single career path they need to follow because it’ll lead them to success. They work hard to achieve this lustrous goal only to find when they achieve it, they aren’t as happy as they thought they’d be.
Now a lot of this is the fault of parents who with good intentions wish to raise self-sufficient adults. But instead of telling our kids they need to make a lot of money. Let’s tell them to find what brings them joy and do that. Maybe if we had kids pursuing those dreams we’d have fewer unhappy teens and fewer teen suicides.
I know what you’re thinking, if we have kids pursuing a dream of being an artist and they can’t sell their art, how do they become self-sufficient? A very good question and I am here with an answer.
In order to pursue their joy, a young adult has to be able to support their dream. They must buy paint, brushes, and canvases, right? So, to do that they’ll have to get a job. Now, the job isn’t all that important, it’s just money to support their dream, but they’ll learn so much from that job. They’ll learn how to get along with people. They’ll learn negotiating skills, and most importantly, they’ll learn what they don’t want to do with their lives. That’s an important lesson to learn, don’t you think?
Another reason everyone should pursue their joy is because it builds resilience. It’s true. I’ve found that a person can handle their bad days on the job, if they know they’re working there for something other than just the money. If they know it’s helping them obtain some other goal.
If they’re there just for the money, they may start to feel trapped and that leads to depression.
So, teach your kids to chase their joy. Whatever it may be. It’ll teach them so much about life and give them direction. Moving forward is important, but we as parents can’t pick our kids lifestyles and goals. They must pick those for themselves. So, why not encourage them to chase something that makes them happy?
Now, most kids have more than one goal. Let’s say they want to be an artist, and have a family. So, now they have more than one goal, and they need to find a job that can support both goals. So, now they really have to think about how to do that. They may start looking into careers that require artistic talent like a graphic artist or an architect. See how this all works? They reached their goals pursuing what they loved to do, and they’re happy.
I know this sounds simplistic, and there are many ways obstacles appear on everyone’s journey, but when you break it down, it really is as uncomplicated as this.
Thanks for reading my post. What makes you happy? Leave a comment. I’d love to hear from you!
Sextortion: Another Danger on Social Media
Hello everyone, I hope all is well with you. I’m back today after a busy week at work and writing, but enough about that. This week I was saddened by the news that a young boy in our state committed suicide. I didn’t know the boy, but whenever I hear of a teen killing themselves it upsets me.
This particular boy was talking with a young girl on social media. Only she wasn’t a young girl, she was a predator posing as a young girl. This predator sent this teen a naked picture of herself and manipulated this boy into sending a naked picture of himself.
Within seconds of sending that picture, the predator sent him a message telling him if he didn’t pay $5000.00, then the predator would post his picture all over social media. Can you imagine the terror this young man felt? His shame and embarrassment? He sent them all the money he had, but the predator demanded more.
This poor child thought the only recourse he had was to kill himself. Can you imagine the depths of his despair? He was a bright kid with a bright future.
These predators are ruthless and smart. They know how to manipulate a young mind. So, parents please talk to your teens about the dangers of social media. They have enough to deal with navigating the trials and tribulations of high school without some predator stalking them on sites they go to to virtually hang out.
The authorities are calling this sextortion.
To prevent this from happening to your child, talk to them about the dangers of social media, even if they don’t want to hear it. Keep the lines of communication open so when they’re unsure about a situation they’ll feel comfortable talking to you, and if they don’t make sure they have a trusted adult in their lives they can go to.
Remember, predators are ruthless. The more you as a parent are involved with your kids, the less likely their manipulations will work on your child. I’m not a psychologist but I do know that parental involvement is the name of the game. Keep showing up for your kids even if they push you away.
They may act like you’re irritating them, but they’ll appreciate you just the same. Thanks for stopping by and reading my post. How do you protect your child from predators on social media? Leave a comment! I’d love to hear from you!
Raising a Highly Sensitive Child
Hello everyone, I hope all is well with you. I’m back today after a week off due to an illness. I can’t remember when I’ve been so sick, but it’s over now and I’m on the mend.
Today, I’d like to talk about dealing with a sensitive child. I have one and I was one, so I know they need to be handled a little differently than a more rambunctious toddler.
It has been proven that sensitivity and intelligence are linked. The more sensitive you are the more intelligent you are. I’ve noticed with my sensitive guy, that this is true. He gets good grades with ease, and he learns things quickly.
Highly-sensitive boys feel their emotions deeply and because of this they can become overwhelmed. They can also stretch themselves too thin. They tend to be people pleasers and perfectionists. So, we as parents need to help them to set healthy boundaries and teach them just because they feel everything doesn’t mean they’re responsible for it.
Many highly sensitive people get trapped in taking on too much responsibility in situations because they feel the emotions of a person in agony, and try to solve the problem when it isn’t their problem. So, teaching them healthy boundaries and what they’re actually responsible for is a must.
For our sensitive littles, home must be a safe haven. Try to keep conflict to a minimum, especially between parents. Sensitive kids can zero in on a conflict and it can stress them out. Try to handle your conflicts in a calm manner, and if you can’t, try to keep it away from your sensitive kids.
Encourage your sensitive child to express their needs. Tell them they’re an important member of the family, and their needs need to be met. Many sensitive kids grow up putting their needs last because they care about other people so much.
Because they feel things so deeply, we as parents have to be careful about discipline. Most sensitive kids don’t need to be harshly disciplined. They need to know they are still loved in spite of their mistakes. A calm conversation with them is really all that’s needed. At least, that has been my experience. Also having a connection with their family is important, too. So, family fun nights are a must.
So, there you have it, my experience dealing with a sensitive child. How about you? What are your experiences? Leave a comment! I’d love to hear from you!
Are Your Kids Resilient?
Hello everyone, I hope all is well with you. I’ve had a busy week of working and running, but sadly not writing, but I hope to remedy that this weekend. But enough about that. Today, I’d like to blog about building resilience in our kids?
It seems like mass shootings are on the rise, suicides are on the rise, and our mental health is declining. These factors tell me that we need to build resilience in our kids. Life is hard and we need to help them handle the curveballs life throws at all of us.
So, how do we create resilience in our kids? I did a little research and I found there are seven key components to building resiliency.
- Competence. Building competence goes beyond getting good grades. One of the best ways to build competence is to ask your child to complete a chore. Have him or her help around the house. Being able to cook and clean for themselves makes our children have confidence in their ability to take care of themselves which is also an important element of self-care.
- Confidence. In order to build confidence, we as parents need to praise them on their efforts as opposed to their intelligence. Kids who have a high level of confidence will be able to bounce back from failing a task. They are more likely to say they’re tactic didn’t work as opposed to they don’t have the ability to do the task. This is an important distinction.
- Connection is another key component. Our children need to feel connected to the people around them, their family and friends. Disconnection is an element in mass shootings and suicides. We can help our kids feel connected when they’re struggling to master a skill by sharing our own stories of when we struggled. Knowing that it’s normal to struggle when mastering a skill will help them to overcome their frustration and accomplish their goal.
- Secure in their character. Studies show that children are born with an innate desire to do the right thing. We as parents can help foster that by encouraging empathic behavior and helping them develop an internal moral compass.
- Contributors. To help kids feel like contributors, show them how their efforts made the family event a success. Have them help with dinner or with the task of cleaning up, then tell them how their efforts made the task go faster or made it easier for you. Show them their actions matter.
- Cope. The ability to cope is another key factor in building resilience. Kids may appear confidence, but when things don’t go according to plan, they fall apart. The ability to manage difficult emotions when faced with adversity helps them view the challenge as a stumbling block. Something they can overcome as opposed to believing the task is beyond them.
- Control. The last factor is control. When a child is raised with consistent caregivers and clear boundaries and connected to the adults in their lives, they feel less stress when challenges arise.
For more information on Building Resilience, click https://www.whitbyschool.org/passionforlearning/7-key-characteristics-of-resilient-children
So, there you have it. The seven key components to building resilience in your kids. How do you build resilience? Leave a comment. I’d love to hear from you!
My Thoughts on the New Avatar Movie
Hello everyone, I hope all is well with you. I’ve had a busy week of work, writing, and running. The holidays are done and we’re settling in for a hibernation period at the Orchards. As I write this post, I’m sitting in front of the fire all snuggled in under my blanket. But enough about that.
Today, I’d like to talk about the movie I saw last weekend with my kids and some extended family. It was the new Avatar movie. It’s titled: “Avatar: The Way of Water.” It was amazing.
It’s three hours long, but it didn’t seem that long. There wasn’t a time when I was in the theater that I looked at my watch and wondered how much longer. I was able to see it in 3D, and it made the experience that much more vivid.
It’s the next chapter in Jake Sully’s life as a married man on Pandora. I must take a moment and say Pandora is a beautiful planet. The forests and the oceans are breathtaking, but I digress. Jake has a family. He has four kids, and he has to disappear in order to protect them from the sky people. I don’t want to give you to many more details because I don’t want to spoil it for you.
It was well written, and the storyline was believable. I would recommend taking your kids to this one. Mine enjoyed it just as much as I did.
So, there you have it. My thoughts on the new Avatar movie. Go see it! You’ll be glad you did! How about you? Any movie recommendations you can give me? I’m always looking for entertainment. 😊
Happy New Year!!
Happy New Year to all my friends and followers! I appreciate you! Let’s make this the best year yet!
Monday Musings
I saw this on Facebook and thought I’d share with all of you. I had a family Christmas yesterday and ran out of time to write a post. Sorry about that, but I found this meme inspiring.
Stress Relief for the Holidays
Hello everyone, I hope all is well with you. I’ve had a busy week of working, shopping, and sneaking in a little bit of writing. It’s busier during the holidays for me, so I haven’t been able to write as much as I like to.
But enough about that. Today, I’d like to talk about dealing with stress during the holidays. It gets busier during the Christmas season and the first thing to go is our self-care routine.
Part of my self-care routine is exercising. I run, but since I’ve developed runner’s hip, I’ve taken up the elliptical machine to give my hip a rest. But I digress, any type of exercise this time of year is an excellent stress reliever. It gets those endorphins pumping.
Another way to relieve stress is to take a few minutes and read a book. Reading for just fifteen minutes has been proven to reduce your stress level by sixty-eight percent. I love reading especially in the winter in front of the fire. It’s a great way to shut the world off and relax.
Hiking is another way to relieve stress. Just getting out into nature and breathing the fresh air clears the cobwebs, and it’s healthy for you too. Hiking in the woods is great because you’re moving and releasing those endorphins, but also because you’re in nature and the trees release phytoncides that we breathe in. These organic compounds boost our immune system. It just goes to show you we’re all connected with the earth, so we should be taking care of it, but that’s another blog post for another time.
Some people take up knitting or crocheting to relieve stress. I haven’t done this, but I’ve heard it’s an excellent way to relax. I’ve taken up painting, but since I’ve been writing, I haven’t had time to paint like I want to. I need to practice and strengthen my skills there. I’ll never be an artist, but it’s fun to take a break and paint.
Another excellent way to relieve stress is yoga. How could I forget yoga? It’s a great way to stretch those muscles and relieve the stress of sitting at a desk all day. I’ve always found yoga has relaxed me, and made me more aware at the same time.
So there, you have it. Some stress relieving activities for the holidays. What are some of the ways you relieve stress? Leave a comment! I’d love to hear from you!
Friday Chuckle!
A friend sent me this via Facebook, and I wanted to share it with all of you because it’s funny and so true!
