Posted in Family, Parenting, raising kids, social media, Teen

Social Media and its Effect on Conflict Resolution

 

 

Hello everyone, I hope all is well with you. I’m back today after a busy week of writing, shuttling my boys to places, and painting. Yes, that’s right. My friends and I got together and had a painting party. It was fun, and I highly recommend it.

 

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Today I’d like to talk about social media and its effect on our ability to resolve conflict. I was thinking about that this morning as I wiped the sleep from my eyes because I’m worried about what the future holds for my kids.

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In my opinion, social media is detrimental to teaching our littles the skill of resolving conflict, of compromising to get along. Why? Because they don’t have to come to a resolution, they just have to turn off the computer. However, they still have to deal with those negative emotions that negative comments and confrontational interactions stir up.

Being able to resolve conflict is an important skill for the working world. What are our littles going to do when they have an upset customer? You just can’t turn off the computer then.

Social Media allows people to turn off their filters and say whatever they want under the guise of just “expressing an opinion.” Then when things get too heated they’ll block someone or logout. So what happens when you’re dealing with someone in real life and things start escalating?

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We need to teach our littles to “agree to disagree” with respect. We can still respect someone who has a different opinion than ours. We as parents need to be the role models for this behavior.  Unfortunately, not all parents do this.

Another reason we need to teach and model appropriate behavior is because of the negative emotions that are stirred up when things escalate out of control. On social, media name calling and bullying cannot be tolerated. The effects of this type of behavior are resounding and have far-reaching consequences after the computer is turned off. Our nationwide suicide rate has increase 25% since 1999.

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Doesn’t that scare anyone? It should. When did social media make its first appearance? 1997. Then blogging became popular in 1999. In the early 2000’s My Space was born and following that, in 2005 YouTube arrived on the scene. Right on YouTube’s heels, Facebook and Twitter.

I hope I’m not the only one seeing a correlation here.

We need to make sure our kids learn how to negotiate and compromise for when they can’t turn off the computer. These skills are vital for them to make their way in the world long after we’re gone, wouldn’t you agree?

Photo credit: Mariana Wagner on Visual Hunt / CC BY-NC

We also need to teach them coping behaviors so they can deal with cyber bullies effectively. They need to learn how not to internalize negative messages and how to deal with the feelings they inspire. We need our “in real life” friends now more than ever, don’t you think?

Thanks for stopping by and reading my post. It ended up being much more serious than what I intended, but sometimes that happens, you know?

Leave a comment. I’d love to hear your thoughts on my thoughts. 🙂

 

 

 

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Posted in inspiration

Tuesday Inspiration

Just a little encouragement on this wonderful Tuesday morning! Keep pushing forward! You can do it!

 

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Posted in Family, inspiration

Saturday Inspiration

Hello everyone, I hope all is well with you! It’s supposed to be a gorgeous day today so I’m taking a blogcation and heading to the lake.  Summer is coming to a close. Sniff. And I’m trying to get as much time in the sun before the cold weather kicks in, but before I go I thought I’d leave you with a little inspiration. I’ll be back next week with our regularly scheduled programming! Have a great weekend!

 

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Posted in Parenting, Uncategorized

Technology: Friend or Foe?

 

Hello everyone, I hope all is well with you. I’ve had a busy week of writing and vacationing. There’s nothing like heading to the lake when you’re experiencing a heatwave. My kids invited a friend along and that made it a little more special because they’ve been friends since my oldest was in kindergarten.

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I was happy the weather cooperated because the kids were able to get out and swim. Physical activity is so important for our young people. I remember when I was growing up we were outside early in the morning and only came home for meals. We rode our bikes everywhere.

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Unfortunately, it’s not like that in today’s world. Kids can’t ride their bikes all over the place because the traffic in our streets is heavy and the streets aren’t as safe as they were twenty years ago. Kidnapping and human trafficking are real issues and it’s happening in every state not just those close to the borders.

So we as parents keep our kids close to home because it’s safer. We have to arrange play dates and take our kids to trampoline parks so they can get exercise and develop face to face social skills. The internet has allowed us to connect to people from all over the world, but it has made our relationships weaker on the home front.

 

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Because of technology, our children are moving less, reading less, and losing opportunities to develop valuable social skills.  Parents need to be cognizant of this. Exercise, Reading, and Face to Face Social Interaction are good for our brains and our bodies. We need to help our kids develop good habits that include all three of the above and they need to do it every day.

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I make sure my kids get out on the trampoline at least a couple times a day when we’re home. I also try and get them to read for half an hour a day, and I try and make sure they have opportunities for social interaction. Some days I do a better job than others. Luckily, we do have neighbor kids they play games with outside where they’re getting their vitamin D.  I haven’t taught them the game Kick the Can, yet. But I will. 😉

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How about you? What do you do to make sure your kids are developing healthy habits? Do you have any suggestions for me? Leave a comment, I’d love to hear from you!

Posted in Public Service Announcements

A Cautionary Tale

 

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Hello everyone, I hope all is well with you. I’m back today on this rainy Saturday with a strange story. I received an email from someone yesterday, and they claimed  they’d hacked my account and had all my contacts. They also claimed they’d hacked into my computer and used my webcam to videotape me accessing porn sites and doing “dirty things.”

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They threatened to send these “videos” to all my contacts unless I sent them $3600.00 in Bitcoins. First of all, I know this is a total scam because I don’t access porn sites and I never have a webcam in my bedroom.

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I called my lawyer friend and asked, “Do people really fall for this?”

He laughed. “You’d be surprised.”

We mulled over how someone could’ve gotten my email address, and we figured out that they must’ve hacked a site where I applied for a job back when I was looking for one. I used a password that I could remember because I was applying to more than one company so I used that password more than once. One of those companies must’ve gotten hacked. In the email, they claimed to have my password, and they did have the one I used when I was looking for a job. I’ve never used that password for my personal email so I knew they didn’t have my contact list.

This is a cautionary tale my dear followers. Make sure you don’t overuse your email password. In fact, I’d only use it once and change your passwords often. It upsets me that people are doing this and getting away with it. These hackers are getting more and more aggressive because they know they’re hard to catch.

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A couple of years ago there was another scam going around where someone would call you on the phone claiming to be from the IRS. This one happened to me, too. When I answered the phone, the person on the other end said he was from the IRS and they had money they needed to send to me. They claimed to need my address, social security number, and bank account number. I told them if they were really from the IRS they’d have all of that information and hung up. They tried calling back a few times, but they were unsuccessful in getting the information they wanted.

These hackers must be successful or they would stop. So please protect your personal information. Make sure your passwords are confidential and change them often.

Photo credit: Cigac Semiárido on Visual Hunt / CC BY-SA

Thanks for stopping by and reading my post today. Have you had anything like this happen to you? How did you handle it? Leave a comment, I’d love to hear from you!