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The movie “Bully”

I just got back from the movie Bully, and I must say it was different than what I expected. I walked into the theater believing I was going to see a story about a young boy who was bullied, but stood up for himself and won out in the end. That’s not what happened, it was real life and it was heartbreaking.

I won’t give you the details, because I don’t want to spoil the movie for you. I encourage you to see it, especially if you’re a parent.

Bullying is a REAL PROBLEM. Kids are committing suicide because of it. The kids who are being bullied need to tell their parents. They need to speak up. They need to speak up before they hurt themselves or someone else. Because it can happen both ways, the victim will retaliate and either hurt themselves or the bullies. Think about what happened at Columbine. That event was a direct result of bullying.

I thought of my two little boys as I watched this movie, and I’m so grateful that the public school they attend has taken a stand against bullying. They don’t even let them use the word hate in the classroom. I love it. More schools need to do this, because this is where most of the bullying takes place, in the hall, on the bus, and in the bathrooms.

School administrators need to watch this movie, because some of them were caught on tape turning a blind eye. Attitudes like that leave the victim feeling powerless.

One thing that I did get out of the movie was that if the victim stands up for himself or herself early in the bullying process, it usually stops. We need to teach our kids to stand up for themselves. I’m definitely going to teach my kids that and I’m going to enroll them in self defense classes. 🙂

I’m going to teach them that they don’t have to be victims.

Posted in Uncategorized


Hello again! I hope all of you are well and I hope you got some useful information out of my last couple of posts.That way  maybe you can help someone who’s dealing with the issues that we’ve been discussing.

Today I want to address the issue of Bullying. Suicide is the third leading cause of death for teenagers between the ages of fifteen to twenty four. To me, this is heartbreaking news. Did you know that one of the contributing factors in teen suicide is victimization from bullying?

What is bullying?

According to Wikipedia, bullying is a form of aggressive behavior manifested by the use of force or coercion to affect others, particularly when the behavior is habitual and involves an imbalance of power.

Bullying consists of three basic types of abuse emotional, verbal, and physical. It usually starts out as verbal abuse, and if it’s not stopped in time it escalates to physical abuse.

Who are the bullies?

Again, according to Wikipedia, research indicates that people with a strong need to control or dominate tend to be bullies. Further studies indicate that envy and resentment may be motives for bullying.

While some bullies are arrogant and narcissistic, others use bullying as a tool to conceal shame or anxiety. By demeaning others, they feel empowered by their dominance.

Who are the victims?

People who react to stressful situations by perceiving themselves as victims tend to be the best targets for bullying.  These people give the response the bully is looking for, submission. However, if the target responds with a clear attitude of self confidence that somehow demonstrates that the bully’s attempt at control is futile, then the bullying will quickly diminish or end all together.

There is another factor to bullying that is intriguing. Despite the large number of individuals who do not agree with the bully’s tactics very few will intervene on behalf of the victim.

In 85% of bullying incidents, bystanders are involved in teasing the victim or egging on the bully. This gives the bully permission to continue behaving badly and may actually increase the behavior.

The reason the bystanders behave this way is because they want to avoid becoming a victim themselves.

Sadly, all it would take is one or two people standing up for the victim to stop the bullying behavior.

What can a victim do?

I found some excellent advice from the link below.

They stress the HA HA SO method

H  Ask for help from friends, teachers, parents, or other adults.

A  Assert yourself. The best way to do this is by using I statements.  For example:  “I feel _____ when you _______.”

H  Humor. The bully wants to upset you. So, instead of getting mad use humor to diffuse the situation.  Be ready with a joke.

A  Avoid. Stay away from the bully as much as possible

S  Self talk.  If you are being bullied, think of good things about yourself even if the bully is picking on you.

O  Own it. Sometimes what the bully says might be true, so you can own the comment.  For example, if a bully is making fun of you because you wear glasses you can say “All the better to see you with.”  You can’t deny you wear glasses, but you don’t have to be ashamed of it either.

Of course, these techniques might not work all the time, nothing is foolproof, but to learn more go to:

I hope you found this information helpful! Please leave a comment or ask a question! If you’d like me to discuss a certain topic just let me know! J Thanks everyone for stopping by! J

Just a side note, I’m planning on going to see the movie BULLY. I was hoping to see it before this post, but it’s not playing in my area yet. Hopefully, by this weekend! I’ll let you know what I think! J