What I’ve been Reading

Hello everyone, I hope all is well with you and that you had a Merry Christmas. I’m back today after a wonderful Christmas holiday. We did some forced family fun and drove around town and looked at Christmas lights. It was so festive and heartwarming. It was also great to get out of the house and go somewhere besides the grocery store. 😉

But enough about that. Today I want to share with you what I’ve been reading. I’m always intrigued by Malcolm Gladwell and I bought myself a Christmas gift. His latest book, “Talking to Strangers: What we should know about people we don’t know.”

It’s eye-opening and I’m intrigued by it. It’s talking about how we are unable to detect when someone is lying to us. It breaks it down into a science. It’s fascinating and I’ll definitely write a review for you, but I wanted to share what I’ve been reading with all of you before I finished the book, because it’s that good.  Now, I’m off to read. Enjoy your holiday!

A Best Book of the Year: The Financial Times, Bloomberg, Chicago Tribune, and Detroit Free Pres
Malcolm Gladwell, host of the podcast Revisionist History and author of the #1 New York Times bestseller Outliers, offers a powerful examination of our interactions with strangers — and why they often go wrong.
How did Fidel Castro fool the CIA for a generation? Why did Neville Chamberlain think he could trust Adolf Hitler? Why are campus sexual assaults on the rise? Do television sitcoms teach us something about the way we relate to each other that isn’t true?
While tackling these questions, Malcolm Gladwell was not solely writing a book for the page. He was also producing for the ear. In the audiobook version of Talking to Strangers, you’ll hear the voices of people he interviewed–scientists, criminologists, military psychologists. Court transcripts are brought to life with re-enactments. You actually hear the contentious arrest of Sandra Bland by the side of the road in Texas. As Gladwell revisits the deceptions of Bernie Madoff, the trial of Amanda Knox, and the suicide of Sylvia Plath, you hear directly from many of the players in these real-life tragedies. There’s even a theme song – Janelle Monae’s “Hell You Talmbout.”
Something is very wrong, Gladwell argues, with the tools and strategies we use to make sense of people we don’t know. And because we don’t know how to talk to strangers, we are inviting conflict and misunderstanding in ways that have a profound effect on our lives and our world.

Merry Christmas!

I hope everyone has a Safe and Happy Holiday!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year

Let’s be like the Trees

Hello everyone, I hope all is well with you. I’m back today after a busy week with work and Christmas shopping and plans. It’s the last weekend before Christmas and we’ve finally got a vaccine being delivered. So, there’s a light at the end of the tunnel for this pandemic. But I don’t want to talk about any of that today because frankly, I’m sick of the pandemic. Today, I’d like to talk about connections. I read an article yesterday and the jist of the article was that trees in a forest communicate with each other through their root systems, and they can even recognize their offspring.  To read the article click this link:

https://www.treehugger.com/trees-talk-each-other-and-recognize-their-offspring-4858710?utm_source=facebook&utm_medium=social&utm_campaign=mobilesharebutton2&fbclid=IwAR2sA4svv4TA6ANYVpeKblEauIHaYQOexMAhfu2Gq3YRuEqrBFsYbKoHdlA

Trees Talk to Each Other

Their root systems are kind of like their own internet. 😊

https://allthefreestock.com/

To me, this is evidence. Evidence that we’re all connected. That the actions of one causes a ripple effect in the universe. Now, the thing about the trees is that they take care of each other. They don’t spew hate along their root system. They send nutrients and healing vibes to their neighbors. Of course, they take extra special care of their offspring which coincides with us taking care of our family.

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This is something we as humans need to emulate. We need to resist acting on our negative emotions. I know this is hard. I have negative emotions, too. But what if we resisted and tried to focus only on the positive. When something negative comes up try to give the other person some grace. They may be dealing with some incredibly difficult issues that they haven’t shared with you.

I also believe we need to practice forgiveness. It’s hard to forgive especially when the person who wronged you doesn’t believe they’ve done anything wrong. It’s hard to forgive someone like that, however, you need to forgive them for you. Holding a grudge is poison. It doesn’t mean you have to continue to take their abuse. You have to do your best to protect yourself even if it means removing yourself from the situation. But do it with grace. Try not to damage the other person too much. They’re already damaged. They wouldn’t have done what they did to you, if they weren’t. Remember that. We’re all broken. Some of us a little and some of us a lot.

https://allthefreestock.com/

I know this seems to go against the theme of this post. Connection, but, I it really doesn’t. If someone who’s abusive to you loses you. Maybe they’ll get help. Maybe they’ll become healthier because you’re leaving was the catalyst for change. So, even when we leave a relationship, we can inspire another person to change and grow. Then when that person gets into another relationship they can do better. It’s the ripple effect.  Let’s try and be like the trees and send positive ripples through our root system and see what kind of world we can create.

https://allthefreestock.com/

Thanks for stopping by and reading my post. How do you stay connected to your loved ones? Leave a comment, I love hearing from you!

P.S.

I saw this on Facebook this morning and thought it was appropriate to add to this post!

Take Care of Your Extrovert Friends

Hello everyone, I hope all is well with you. I’m back today after a week of work, writing and the pandemic. Truth be told the pandemic hasn’t had that negative of an effect on me. I’m an introvert by nature and in the winter, we hunker down and hibernate.

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Don’t get me wrong. I miss going to the movies with my mom and out for a meal with my family, but I’m not chomping at the bit because I can’t get out and socialize. However, our extrovert friends can’t claim the same. The mild discomfort us introverts feel is nothing compared to what our extroverted friends are going through. They get energized by interacting with people, so this social distancing is hard for them, I’m sure.

https://allthefreestock.com/

I know we should be thankful for the technology that allows us to interact via zoom calls and WebEx, but it isn’t the same as being in the same room as someone and interacting with their energy. The world before the pandemic was made for the extrovert. That world has been turned upside down, and this pandemic has many of us introverts thriving. While we’re finding our inner peace because we aren’t forced to interact outside of our homes, our extroverts are floundering.

https://allthefreestock.com/

Many of us are working from home. I love it. I used to drive ten hours a week to get to work. So, the extra ten hours a week I get for not driving, I get to devote to something I really want to do like writing. I also find freedom in the fact that I can get up fifteen minutes before work starts and do my job in my pajamas. I don’t do this. I always get up and shower before I start working. I feel more professionally prepared when I do this. 😉

However, just knowing I have that option gives me a sense of freedom. Our extroverts don’t feel the same way. They need social interaction to feel energized and they’re not getting it. It’s no wonder that the suicide rate is on the rise and there’s also a rise in domestic violence.

The increase in these occurrences aren’t just due to the isolation, though. There are other factors involved like the loss of income and displacement from homes that need to be considered. This is a hard time for all of us, but for our extroverts especially.

https://allthefreestock.com/

So, let’s keep this in mind as we interact with people even if it’s during a WebEx meeting. Let’s make sure we’re kind and giving. I know we’re all financially strapped because many of us aren’t working because of the lockdown, but if we have an opportunity to give even if it’s just a kind word let’s do it. Let’s reach out even if it’s just a phone call to our extroverted friends and let them know we’re thinking of them. They need it now more than ever.

Thanks for stopping by and reading my post. Do you have some ways we can take care of our extroverted friends? Leave a comment! I’d love to hear from you!  

Your Teen and Pandemic Stress

Hello everyone, I hope all is well with you. I’m back today after a busy week at work and writing. I’ve started the dreaded treadmill season where I run on the treadmill instead of going outside. I’ve finally adjusted to this even though I still struggle with motivation.

But on a positive note, I had my blood work done and my numbers look much better than they did last year. So, I’ve accomplished my goal. I’ve improved my health. 😊

Enough about that, though. Today, I’d like to talk about helping your teen deal with the stress and anxiety brought about because of the pandemic. It’s a tough time for them. They can’t socialize like normal and their activities have become severely limited. I bring this up today because we had a fourteen-year-old boy commit suicide in our state during a zoom meeting with his classmates. No one saw this coming. None of his classmates or his parents.

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Now more than ever, kids need to feel connected to their families. This is a good time to do forced family fun nights. We spend time either playing Uno or watching The Office. I know. It can get kind of raunchy, but there’s some quality stuff in the show as well. For example, when Jim and Pam went to couples counseling and illustrated how to communicate with your spouse. That was brilliant. Kids need to learn how to handle conflict and how to express their needs. I loved that about that episode.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SIi8i3Pf3Ys&ab_channel=LaurenAmeruoso

The show also brings diversity to the forefront with the gay character of Oscar. I think this is important to show how to accept people who are different from us. It’s also funny. The different personalities of the characters are taken to the extreme to show how we can all get along using humor and sarcasm as a way of deflecting negativity.

Another way kids can deal with this stress is video games. I know. I know. I’ve heard all the negatives about video games, but in this time of no activities and no school there is still a way to connect with their friends. They can connect through their games. I like this because my boys can stay safe and still have a little bit of social interaction. They can do this without getting on social media. You still must take precautions. I advise them to not share any personal information with anyone online, but for the most part they play games with kids they hang out with in school, so it’s working. They can connect and stay safe at the same time.

https://allthefreestock.com/

I also encourage them to get outside for at least an hour a day. It’s harder to do now that it’s gotten cold, but they do get out and get fresh air and exercise. One of my boys has gotten into weightlifting and another has started running on the treadmill. Exercise is another healthy way to deal with stress, and it helps that both hubby and I run. We are modeling the behavior we want them to engage in. So, not only are we talking the talk, but we’re walking the walk also.

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So, there you have it. Some ways to help your teens deal with the stress of isolation. How about you? Do you have any ideas? Leave a comment, I’d love to hear from you!