Posted in inspiration, kindness, Women

Don’t Judge Me


Hello everyone. I hope all is well with you. I’ve reached the 50,000 word mark on my latest manuscript. I reached it on the thirtieth of November so if I were competing in Nano, I would’ve reached my goal. I was hoping to be finished with the story by this time, but alas, it is not meant to be. It’s not done, but I’m a lot closer than I was. I’m guessing between twenty and thirty thousand more words will do the trick. Fingers crossed. 🙂

Photo on VisualHunt

But enough about that. I’m back today to talk about something I feel is important for all of us of the female persuasion and that is supporting each other. My new motto for 2018 is going to be “Don’t Judge Me.” I think we’ll get much further ahead if we stop judging each other. Instead, we should embrace our differences and support each other.

I see this support in the writing community and it amazes me. I come from a male dominated field where things were extremely competitive. So when I did come across another woman, she tended to be territorial and back-stabby. I’m sure you all know this type. So when I started writing and found other supportive women, it was truly a gift and something I had to get used to.

Photo by erlin1 on Visual hunt / CC BY-NC-ND

Why haven’t we does this in the past? I believe it’s because we have grown up with the idea that there isn’t enough to go around. Enough money. Enough self-respect. Enough self-worth.  Enough love.  We don’t believe our needs will get met so we search outside ourselves to find someone who’ll meet our needs, when what we really need to do is search within ourselves, and figure out what makes us whole.

For me, it’s my writing. I could do this all day, every day, so in times of great stress that’s what I do to ease my angst. It’s different for everyone. Some people paint, some exercise, and some work. Whatever it is, find your passion. It will calm the inner storm and you’ll feel self-reliant.

Sorry, I digress. We were talking about women bonding together. Wait. I did have a reason for bringing the passion thing up. Here’s my point. We need to support each other in the pursuit of our passions. We need to bond together, not judge each other when we walk a different path, because we all have our own path and our own lessons to learn, wouldn’t you agree?

Photo on

So let’s do that. Stop judging. Be more accepting of our differences. We are all unique snowflakes, and we all deserve to be appreciated and respected. Am I right, or am I right?

What are you passionate about? How do you feel about women being supportive of each other? Leave a comment. I’d love to hear from you!


I'm a Young Adult Author with two new series, "The Starlight Chronicles" and "The Super Spies." The first one's a coming of age series and the second one's a mystery/thriller series. I'm also the mother of two boys who keep me hopping and they're my inspiration for everything. When I'm not shuttling my boys to school or a play date, I'm writing. When I'm not writing, I'm reading, hiking, or sometimes running. I love anything chocolate and scary movies too.

39 thoughts on “Don’t Judge Me

    1. Thank you! I feel good about it. This story I’m working on is a tough one to write. I’m having some growing pains as a writer, so reaching that mark was a big accomplishment for me. Thanks for stopping by and sharing your thoughts! 🙂

  1. I think the phrase “Never judge a book by it’s cover” should also apply to humans – we should never judge people by their outward appearance, actions or hearsay. Jealousy also plays a big part – some people need to curb their jealousy of other people’s successes, large or small, and be supportive & genuinely pleased for people. Instead of being jealous perhaps we should try to be inspired & motivated to achieve the same dizzy heights. But, we are only human after all. 😊

    1. True. I think we’ll curb jealousy by reminding ourselves that the person we’re jealous of is on their own path just as we are on ours. So if we commit ourselves to our path and work every day to get further along on our journey, we’ll be too busy to worry about what someone else is doing. We all need to focus on our own goals. 🙂

  2. You are so right and I think as women we can not do enough to encourage each other in pursuing our passions! I have so many talented friends (writers, painters, etc.) who don’t give themselves enough credit and just need more uplifting words like these. Thank you!

  3. Well done on your manuscript!!

    I love that my friends are so supportive, and I am glad to hear you found a group of supportive sweeties. I would fare really badly in a cut throat environment!! What industry were yu in that was like that?

      1. You’d’ve thought that the company would do even better if you all worked together. I guess when sales are commission based that is hard.

  4. Oh my goodness, Lisa, well put! I couldn’t agree with you more!!! As a blogger, I’ve found everyone to be SO much nicer/more supportive/etc. than my former field (higher education) – so yes, I was once passionate about teaching, but one toxic work environment after another can snuff that out of you pretty quickly. Don’t miss it a lick, and SO much happier now that I’m doing writing that’s a whole lot more fun, interesting, and well-supported by others than scholarly work that practically no one will ever read 🙂

    1. I’m glad to hear you’re out of that toxic environment. That kind of stress can make you sick. I’m glad you’re having fun with your writing and that you have support. That is so awesome!

  5. Lisa, I love this post of yours and I completely agree with you! In my experiences, women are much more judgmental overall. I’m more aware of this as I creep into my later 30’s than I ever have been before. I think this is because I have now experienced women who are supportive (within my job, in our blogging group, and within my own family). Maybe we get to an age where happiness, love, acceptance, and all of those mushy things are more important than being the best. It’s a lovely thing to experience and we need more of it!

    1. I agree with you! I’ve experienced so much support from the writing community, I’d forgotten how supportive we can be of each other. I think the industry I was in fostered competition because they thought we (the sales reps) would sell more.

  6. Oh, and congratulations on your writing – 50,000 words is huge! And, I’m seriously considering your suggestion of writing a fiction book about my family farm and all of the hidden treasures we have discovered (your suggestion in your synchronicity post). I can’t get the possibilities out of my head. Maybe, just maybe – my first novel will be born. 🙂

  7. All the women I’ve ever worked with have been very supportive. Actually, I think that applies to almost everyone I’ve worked with, with a few notable exceptions. I’m sorry that your experience has been different.

  8. I completely agree! Women should definitely be more supportive of one another. I feel like it is too natural nowadays to turn towards breaking one another down rather than building each other up!

    A huge congratulations to you on your 50,000 words! That is AMAZING! I am passionate about many different things… photography, science, writing, and travel are four of them!

    1. Thanks for stopping by and sharing your kind words. I’m with you every step of the way, we need to build each other up. I think it comes down to our own self esteem and need for recognition. The belief there isn’t enough to go around. Once we get over that hurdle, I believe we’ll be more accepting of others. (fingers crossed)
      I can tell you’re passionate about your photography. You take amazing pictures. Keep sharing them with all of us! 🙂

  9. I love this! I want to scream ‘Don’t judge me’ so much and reading this post has spurred me on for next year. My word for next year was going to be ‘relevance’, however I am going to add in Don’t Judge Me too! Congrats on reaching 50,000 words, that is immense xx Sim

  10. Lisa, this is such an important topic! Thank you for reminding us once again. In fact, the world would be a much better place if no one judged anyone! When I started my blog, my second post was about this very topic because I felt, by stepping out with my truth, I was going to subject myself to being judged. It brought a new perspective to me about the way I have judged others in the past. Right on!

  11. I personally just think we should all live with the motto of “Make Other People Look Better” – if we all live like that, we aren’t putting others down, we support them, we help them, and we are nice to them…and if we all live by that, then no one is trying to make just themselves look better – we raise ourselves as a stronger, supporting, loving group. 🙂

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