You might be a Bad Housewife If…

Hello everyone. I hope all is well with you. Spring break is upon us. Finally! I’m looking forward to this break because both boys will be with friends so I’m going to have plenty of writing time. I did get some feedback from my beta reader and she loved the first one hundred pages! Yay me! She’s going to finish it up and let me know how she feels about the rest of it soon.  🙂

But enough about that. Today I’m back and I’m talking about being a bad housewife. I must confess I’d rather be writing than cleaning and sometimes my house reflects that. I also have a hard time throwing things away because every little scrap of paper has some sort of memory attached to it. So I must keep it. You know how it is. 🙂

So I’ve put together a list of Bad Housewife Traits that you may or may not identify with. 😉 I’ve posted the list below.

 

  1. You may be a bad housewife if you have a secret room where you stash all your clutter before company arrives.

Photo credit: Stewart Black via Visual Hunt / CC BY

2. You may be a bad housewife if you wait until the very last item of clothing is worn before you do the laundry.

Photo via Visual Hunt

3. You may be a bad housewife if you see a cobweb but leave it because spiders need homes, too.

Photo credit: Novowyr (Slow) via Visualhunt / CC BY-NC-SA

4. You may be a bad housewife if you don’t take out the garbage until you can smell it.

Photo via Visual Hunt

5. You may be a bad housewife if when sweeping the floor you literally sweep the dirt under the rug because you just can’t find the dustpan.

6. You may be a bad housewife if you watch “Hoarders” to feel better about your housekeeping skills.

Photo credit: ejbSF via Visual Hunt / CC BY-NC-ND

7. You may be a bad housewife if your kids can write their names in the dust that has accumulated on your tabletops.

8. You may be a bad housewife if your floors are sticky from spills that haven’t been wiped up.

9. You may be a bad housewife if ants parade across your counter because it’s a smorgasbord of crumbs and other delectable bites. You just don’t have time to wipe them up.

Photo credit: tarotastic via Visual hunt / CC BY-NC

10. You may be a bad housewife if you haven’t changed the kitty litter in three weeks and it’s so bad, you’re cat won’t even use it.

Photo credit: AJ Franklin via VisualHunt.com / CC BY-NC-ND

If you recognize yourself in any of the comments above. You can get help. There are organizations out there that can give you assistance in decluttering your home and get it spic and span clean. You could even audition for “Hoarders.” 🙂

 

Thanks for stopping by and reading my post today. I hope you got a chuckle out of it. Do you have any Bad Housewife habits you’d like to share? Please do. I’d love to hear from you!

 

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About Lisa Orchard

I'm a Young Adult Author with two new series, "The Starlight Chronicles" and "The Super Spies." The first one's a coming of age series and the second one's a mystery/thriller series. I'm also the mother of two boys who keep me hopping and they're my inspiration for everything. When I'm not shuttling my boys to school or a play date, I'm writing. When I'm not writing, I'm reading, hiking, or sometimes running. I love anything chocolate and scary movies too.
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23 Responses to You might be a Bad Housewife If…

  1. April Munday says:

    I feel a certain amount of relief, but suspect I shouldn’t.

  2. While I’m not technically a housewife, of course, I am profoundly lazy. I clean just enough to ensure that my little apartment isn’t gross, but since I share my home with a long-snouted scavenger of a dog, any garbage I produce with food remnants upon it has to be stored in the refrigerator, otherwise Bernadette will tear through the garbage in order to find the hidden treasure. So I store garbage in my fridge until I get the wherewithal to take out the trash and consequently, the juxtaposition of food and rubbish often I find upon opening the refrigerator door spoils my appetite.

  3. noellekelly says:

    I’d rather do anything else than clean, definitely a bad housewife!

  4. Spiders DO need homes. I give everyone a pass for that one. I even like spiders hanging outside under the eaves because they eat bugs.

    • Lisa Orchard says:

      I hear you! They aren’t as evil as they appear, but I will say I don’t like having them in the house. I don’t kill them though. I just take them outside without touching them of course. 😉

  5. lilhiddentreasures says:

    I think I may be guilty in a few counts….

  6. sharonledwith says:

    So hilarious, Lisa! I have to admit, I need a clean house. I would go absolutely nuts if my home was cluttered and dusty. Plus our pet shed like fiends! Ugh! Need a housekeeper! Cheers!

  7. I have to have things clean and tidy. I’m not fanatical about it, I just like neat and tidy and clean. But sometimes the fridge needs attention because leftovers turn into Lab Experiments. :o)

    • Lisa Orchard says:

      I hear you! This post is mainly about humor. I wanted to write something light-hearted and funny. I do confess to a little bit of clutter, but my house is pretty clean. 🙂 Thanks for stopping by. I appreciate you taking the time to leave a comment. 🙂

  8. Since I can relate to nearly all of these Skills (they are skills btw) as a househusband, I think we should really focus of the dedication to efficiency each of these carefully honed abilities entails. Laundry, trash, organizing…all of these things are under the purvue of entropy. We’re just choosing to apply ourselves in more useful endeavors (like writing or catching up on Netflix). Bravo!

    • Lisa Orchard says:

      That is a very good point! We should stop focusing on the negative and turn it into a positive! Oh…you are such a smart man, Gabe! I think I’ll name one of my characters after you! 🙂

  9. #6 is a standard for me. I either feel relief afterward and it relaxes me or I feel like I’m getting a little too close to the hoarder edge and it’s time for me to clean a closet or something.

    • Lisa Orchard says:

      I hear you, Christine! I’m not hoarder material yet and I know I won’t get that bad, but there are days when I let things go so I can finish a novel or a difficult scene. I always feel like cleaning when I’m done though. 🙂

  10. emfletche says:

    Tee hee, I’m sure my mom still comes round when I’m on holiday to give the place “a bit of a tidy”! Our problem is not putting things away, until there’s piles of random stuff on the dining table or on the bottom of the stairs like done extreme game of jenga. THAT’S when we have a mad cleaning day!

    • Lisa Orchard says:

      I hear you! My kids get so many papers from school and they just pile them up on the table. Then I have to go through and keep some and throw some away. It’s hard to decide sometimes. 🙂

  11. #6: I can even eat ice cream while watching Hoarders, because those people make me feel like I’ve got my act together. No matter how bad it gets around here, I have never and will never need a shovel to clear the clutter. That level of success deserves a reward, right?

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