Why Don’t Schools have Relationship Classes?

Hello Everyone! I hope all is well with you today! I’m back after being extremely ill for the last week.  Boo! My whole family had this cold/flu bug that’s been going around, but we’re on the mend this week. Well…enough about that. Today I wanted to talk about teen relationships.

During the teen years there are a lot of firsts. First feelings…first dances…first kisses…etc.  Since this is a period of a lot of first times, there are many new emotions that teens haven’t felt before and therefore are inexperienced in handling.

Because of that inexperience some teens may use controlling or manipulative behavior to try and avoid the painful feelings of rejection.  This is unfortunate but true. This kind of behavior can take teens down a destructive path both for the controller and the teen that’s the object of control.

Now, keep in mind the person who’s attempting to control the situation is not trying to be manipulative in any way…they are trying to avoid the pain of rejection. However, his/her controlling behavior does have a detrimental effect. If the teen who doesn’t want to be in the relationship can’t break out of that controller’s grip, he/she’s in a relationship that is no longer working for them. This is where, in my humble opinion, the relationship becomes unhealthy and could even become abusive.

Unfortunately, I see this in many young adult relationships and as a result there’s decreased self-esteem for both parties involved. So what is the answer? I have one…but you knew that didn’t you? 🙂

I think all teens should have to take “Relationship Classes” or “Relationship Workshops.” That’s right; in my opinion these classes should be a requirement of the school curriculum…just like sex education. 🙂

In these classes we can teach teens what an unhealthy relationship is. We can show them what negative behaviors should not be tolerated.  I feel this is important for our kids. These classes will help them maintain healthy self-esteem; and what better place to learn about relationships than in school next to their peers. 🙂 The same peers they are having relationships with.

We can give them tools to cope with unhealthy situations. One that comes to mind is what can a young girl do when she wants to end a relationship with a young man and he threatens suicide? Or the other way around? These situations have spun out of control and are too much for any teen to handle. An adult has to be involved…but how many teens talk to their parents at this stage of the game? Very few.  I say let’s give them the tools they need, so  they can recognize these unhealthy situations. We could even take it a step further and teach them healthy communication skills. They will be better adults in the long run.

Thanks for stopping by and reading my post. As always, I’m sharing my personal opinion and would love to hear some of your ideas! Please leave a comment; I’d love to hear from you!

Advertisements

About Lisa Orchard

I'm a Young Adult Author with two new series, "The Starlight Chronicles" and "The Super Spies." The first one's a coming of age series and the second one's a mystery/thriller series. I'm also the mother of two boys who keep me hopping and they're my inspiration for everything. When I'm not shuttling my boys to school or a play date, I'm writing. When I'm not writing, I'm reading, hiking, or sometimes running. I love anything chocolate and scary movies too.
This entry was posted in Teen and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

14 Responses to Why Don’t Schools have Relationship Classes?

  1. 1 in 3 teens are in some form of an abusive relationship- which is crazy scary. Raising awareness and providing education on what’s a healthy relationship is so very important. I love your ideas of classes and workshops. Or at the very least, readily available information. Great information- great post.

    • Lisa Orchard says:

      Thanks for stopping by Rebecca! I agree that raising awareness is the first step! If we make it part of the curriculum then students will understand how important this information is. 🙂

  2. sharonledwith says:

    I think the entire school system is ready for an overhaul! Love your idea, Lisa, healthy, vibrant, confident children = healthy, vibrant, confident adults! Cheers!

  3. mazohystic says:

    At first, just by looking at the title, I thought you were talking about all kinds of relationships, haha. Kind of like a social skills class. I gotta say, I would have definitely appreciated that.

    Back to the topic… In all of my years of schooling so far (minus high school and university) we had health classes. These health classes focused on not just physical health but also mental health as well. In fact, most of the emphasis was on mental health. It mostly taught us how to deal with things such as stress, family, friends, and romantic relationships. It didn’t go too in depth but it was there. I’d like to more of it for sure. Sad thing is that not a lot of kids took health class seriously (I know I didn’t back then).

  4. mazohystic says:

    I tried to post a comment then WordPress asked me to log in, I did, and I lost the comment. 😦 I’ll try to recreate it to the best of my ability.

    Just by looking at the title, I thought you meant an all around relationship classes. Kind of like building social skills. I would have appreciated those kind of classes a few years ago haha.

    In all of my years of schooling so far (minus high school and university), I had to take mandatory health classes. It not only focused on physical health but mental health as well. In fact, mental health was the main focus of the course. For example, it dealt with how to cope with stress, coworkers, family members, friends, and significant others. It didn’t go too in depth but it was there. I would love to see that part of the course expanded. Sadly, not a lot of kids took health class seriously (I know I didn’t back then).

    Great post and great idea, by the way. 🙂

    • Lisa Orchard says:

      Thanks for stopping by mazohystic! I’m glad to hear that your classes had a great deal of focus on mental health. That’s a step in the right direction. When I was in school…a loooonnng time ago our health class focused mainly on physical health and not emotional health. Just from your comment I think we’re moving in the right direction. 🙂 Thanks for your kind words! 🙂

  5. Danny Adams says:

    Well timed–the college I work for is doing a session tomorrow night called the “Healthy Relationship Program”.

  6. sarastinson says:

    Hi Lisa.
    Health classes do cover these areas in schools. (For some students, more in-depth classes or workshops would be an idea.) We have a full-time counselor in our schools who provides counseling when needed. Teachers here already have Character Traits lessons they teach each week. At one of our schools, the students would have a Character Trait word. The principal would announce the word over the speaker and explain the word, and then give an example. Students would then write about that word using their own experiences. I have seen schools provide older peers as mentors for students. They would be there for the person whenever they needed to talk or help with homework. We also have a DARE program that not only taught the students to say “NO”, but gave them positive outlets to go to if they ever did get in trouble. This carried over for any problem.
    Schools that did provide such classes would have to plan and follow state and federal guidelines. Even counselors have to watch what they say and what they present to students. Then there would be parent permission and parent involvement.

    I am saying this is a good idea, and awareness is always good. As a teacher I want others to know there are programs. I believe the true origin has to start in the home. We can make them aware and support them, but it is up to the family to carry it through.

    • Lisa Orchard says:

      Thanks for stopping by Sara! I agree it starts in the home…but it would be great if the schools could support it as well! 🙂

      • sarastinson says:

        Yes, it would. Our schools are wonderful to provide more one-on-one help here. I think it is because everyone knows everyone and is more inclined to become involved. (Small town) 🙂

        Maybe this will be more of a reality in other schools.!

      • Lisa Orchard says:

        I think it very well could be! 🙂 Based on some other comments that I’ve heard! 🙂 Thanks for stopping by Sara! 🙂

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s