Posted in promotion

Please Welcome Astraea Press Author Kelly Martin!

Hello Everyone! I hope all is well with you! I’ve got Kelly Martin here today and she’s talking about her new release SAINT SLOAN! Take it away Kelly!

I want to thank Lisa for having me on her blog today! I’m doing a one day blog tour to get the word out about my new book, SAINT SLOAN. It’s a YA/Inspirational/Suspense novel about a girl named Sloan and her birthday gone horrible wrong.

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BLURB:

When Sloan Bridges is seventeen years and three hundred, sixty-four days old, her dream of having a perfect birthday is shattered. Home alone after spending the afternoon working on a sci-ence project at the new boy’s house, Sloan is brutally attacked in her kitchen by a man she can’t recognize. The only clue she has to go on is what he whispers in her ear, “You deserve this.”

The police have one suspect—Aaron Hunter, older brother of ‘the new boy’, who picked Sloan up a few nights before as she ran from a party. Adamant that he didn’t do it, Aaron begs Sloan to believe him. For her part, Sloan doesn’t know who to trust. She never saw her attacker’s face, and when she does picture it, it’s Aaron’s face she sees standing over her.

Trying to move on is impossible with a former best friend who taunts her and gives her the moniker, “Saint Sloan”, an ex-boyfriend who doesn’t understand why she changed a few months before her attack, and Aaron’s brother, Ray, who makes Sloan smile but has a side she doesn’t understand.

With her attacker ready to strike again, Sloan has to figure out who would hurt her and stop him before he finishes what he started.

Happy birthday to her…

 

Excerpt from SAINT SLOAN—The ‘Talk’

Since it was past eight o’clock, every red light in Chapel Hill flashed yellow. Aaron drove through two of them then gently pushed on the brakes. “Here’s your house.”

“I still can’t believe you remember all of this.”

He shrugged and flipped on his blinker. “I always liked this neighborhood.”

Straight ahead was a two-car garage covered with white siding that matched the house. When she was little, both sides of the garage were used. After her dad left, her mom’s side had the only car. That would change on Tuesday.

The garage was attached by a small covered walkway to the two-story house with a large wrap around porch along the front. Except for color and a few minor touches, most of the houses on Oak Street looked similar. All had small front yards and larger backyards. Some were fenced. Some weren’t. Sloan’s wasn’t.

“Do you still live in the same house you did before?”

“Yeah. My mom never sold it. Surprisingly,” he sounded bitter. “It was my great-grandma’s so totally paid for.”

“That’s good then. I’m glad you are getting to stick around.”

“Me, too.” His eyes caught hers and for a minute, she couldn’t look away.

She got her wits about her finally and grabbed the door handle. “Well, thanks for bringing me home.”

“Anytime.”

The cold air slammed against her, and she immediately missed the warmth of Aaron’s Mustang. With one last smile, she shut the car door and walked the stone path to the porch steps. She got her key from her pocket and placed it in the lock. An oak sign that had been on the crimson door as long as she could remember welcomed her home. With one last wave to Aaron, she walked inside and locked the door.

To her right was the living room decorated in blues and chocolate browns. At one time, the room had been a dark shade of pink. It changed the day Sloan’s dad took off with her mom’s best friend’s twenty-year old niece, Tiffani, whose favorite color was pink. Her mom became a different person, trying everything she could to ‘stay’ young. Sometimes, Sloan thought she went too far.

Sloan figured her mom would be asleep in her bedroom upstairs and didn’t want to wake her. She quietly laid her keys in the antique bowl sitting on her grandma’s cherry table in the foyer. The large silver mirror hanging over the table caught her reflection. She wrinkled her nose at the sorry sight. Her golden hair, thanks to frequent salon visits, fell wildly out of its hairband. The little braid along the side that had been so cute when she left the house barely clung to the falling out bobby pin, and her side-swept bangs were still damp from Darcy’s well-aimed beer. A much-needed shower would have to wait, though. Her stomach needed food.

Trying to figure out what to eat, she stepped down into the kitchen to her right. Unlike the living room, the kitchen décor survived ‘Tiffani-gate’. White cabinets hovered over charcoal-colored countertops. All appliances were stainless steel, and a long granite island with a white base sat in the middle of the room.

Sloan went to the fridge to see if she could scrounge up something. Neither of them had gone shopping since Thanksgiving. She was so tired of leftover turkey and dressing, and it had only been one day. Noticing that the milk had expired the day before, she resigned herself to eating a bowl of cereal without it.

She threw a bite of the sugary cereal in her mouth and looked out the window over the sink. At a little after ten, the neighborhood was dead. Cars passed sparsely, and most houses already had their lights off for the night. The street rolled up early in Chapel Hill.

Tired and ready to join her neighbors in sleep, she took her bowl and turned toward the foyer. A dark figure standing in the doorway made her scream and fumble with the bowl.

In an instant, her eyes were nearly blinded by a bright light.

“Sorry. Didn’t mean to scare you,” her mom said with her hand on the light switch. Sloan squinted and blinked until her eyes adjusted. When they did, she saw her mom in a fluffy purple robe and slippers. Her blonde hair, achieved the same way Sloan got hers, was gathered in a long side braid. She was a little taller and a little skinnier than Sloan. Since her father had left with Tiffani, her mom had also gotten some enhancements in other areas, though to Sloan’s knowledge her mom hadn’t dated much.

“I just wasn’t expecting you to be up. That’s all.”

“And I wasn’t expecting you home so early. Did you have a good time?”

“I guess you could call it that.” If you were a total and complete liar. She ate some cereal to keep from elaborating.

“So, who drove you home?”

Sloan stopped mid-chomp.

“I saw the Mustang in the driveway, and Mackenzie has a Honda. So… spill. Got a new feller?”

“Mom!” Sloan’s cheeks burned. “I haven’t had a ‘feller’ since Boyd. I don’t even really want a guy.”

Her mom took a seat at the end of the island. “Not all guys are like Boyd.”

“That’s a good thing,” Sloan said bitterly. Boyd had ‘loved’ her during her wild days and got mad when she wouldn’t sleep with him anymore after she got saved. He dumped her one night after a huge blow up and started dating Darcy the next day.

“Wanna talk about it? What happened at the party?”

“Who said anything happened?”

“Well, you’re home before curfew and smell like a keg.”

Sloan groaned and fell onto the barstool next to her mom. She set the bowl on the island and picked out the green cereal bites. “Same ole same ole. Darcy can’t keep her big mouth shut and appears to have really good aim.” Sloan held out a strand of her nasty hair.

~*~*~*~

Can’t wait to read more? Buy the book from any of the links below:

AMAZON: http://www.amazon.com/Saint-Sloan-ebook/dp/B00BMQ9E9O/ref=pd_sim_kstore_1

BARNES AND NOBLE: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/saint-sloan-kelly-martin/1114723748?ean=2940016377308

SMASHWORDS: http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/290677

ASTRAEA PRESS: http://www.astraeapress.com/#!/~/product/category=662245&id=20839143

KOBO: http://www.kobobooks.com/ebook/Saint-Sloan/book-wNrqosRRB0i2jU9ym34izg/page1.html?s=4Xoj6XizzUOFvTfhOsZ87Q&r=1

Thank you so much for having me here today!

Author bio:

~Kelly Martin is a best selling author of young adult fiction. She has two books: Grace Award nominee CROSSING THE DEEP and Amazon Best selling in Teen/Religion SAINT SLOAN. She has several short stories published and loves to write ‘twitter fiction’ when she’s bored. Kelly loves God, is addicted to chocolate, and would rather write than sleep.

You can find her on twitter (she tweets a lot): @martieKay

You can find my author page (blog tour central): at www.kellymartinstories.com

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Posted in promotion

Please Welcome Author Lori Lapekes!

Hello Everyone! I hope all is well with you today! I’ve got my good friend and fellow Astraea Press author Lori Lapekes here and she’s answering a few questions for all of us!  Take it away Lori!

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  1. Why did you choose to write a book in the Romantic Suspense Genre?

Most of my books are generally off-beat love stories, some with and some without a suspense plot. As “Secrets of Catalpa Hall” is based upon a real place we used to go to when my sisters and I were kids, (and it always seemed kind of magical and scary) the idea of a death under mysterious circumstances there was easy to believe and write about.

2.  Who is your favorite character you have written and why?

That would have to be Daniel LaMont, the musician in my upcoming novel “The Gingerbread Boy,” hopefully to be released this May. I used to LOVE to watch the David Copperfield magician specials on television years ago, and had a huge crush on him. I saw him live several times, and briefly met him, and he seemed very kind as well as mysterious and talented. When I pictured Daniel when writing the novel, I sort of pictured David Copperfield from 20 years ago. I think I still have a crush on my own character—so why I put him in such a bad situation in the novel… (he is struggling with a terrible illness) is a story explained at the end of the book. 😉

3.  Describe a typical writing day for you?

Usually a lot of editing and rewriting! I work full time, and for many years I was a single mother, so I wrote in spare moments sitting on the couch curled up with a pen and paper and usually a cat on my lap. I still write by hand, I don’t type well, never could, and have to hire someone to type my manuscripts. (If I was a great typist, I’d probably still write by hand, as I need the flow from the pen to the paper to create.) Typing to me is a ghastly chore…

4.  What are you reading at the moment?

I just got done reading Jurassic Park again, I always loved that book and the feel of the story gets me in the mood for what I’m writing now, a young adult fantasy novel. I also just re-read “1984”, as my daughter found it at a garage sale. How depressing, yet how great the world really isn’t that bad now. Probably because the book WAS published, and warned people…so books do matter!

5.   Who is your favorite author and why?

Oddly, I love to read the adventure novels by Douglas Preston and Lincoln Child.

Although I write love stories, and those are fulfilling and sort of healing for me, I love adventure!

6.   If you could invite 3 authors to dinner, who would they be and why?

C.S. Lewis…resurrected. My favorite Christian author-such a brilliant mind.

Steven King. I have a feeling he is a lot more spiritual than many think, and I’d like to (casually) pick his brain to find out what he believes about God.

Anyone else would be a huge mix—I can’t seem to pick one out…

7.  Tell us something no one knows about you.

I am afraid of machines. Even computers and tablets! I’m not sure why, but I think it’s because I nearly lost my arm in a machine called the “muncher” years ago when I worked in a cookie factory, and have nightmares about it still. (Note: Windmill cookies were sometimes made when all kinds of cookies fell off of the line to the floor. They were scooped up and mixed with another recipe in “The Muncher” and made into Windmill Cookies. (At least they were in the shop I worked in— but it’s long gone now. Probably the Muncher grew up and ate it!

8.  What are you working on now?

A young adult fantasy story I started several years ago and thought I lost after about 18 pages. When I moved last year, I found it again!! I now have the time and ambition to finish it. It’s fun! Tornadoes, dinosaurs, mysterious stinky shuffling boxes, all kinds of weirdness…

9.  If you could travel anywhere in the world, where would you go and why?

So many places to visit….so little vacation time—or cash.  Probably Australia. I love their accents!

10.   What are some of the things you enjoy when you’re not writing?

I love to walk and play with my German Shepherd Maddy. (My best furry friend.) I also love antiques and bargains, and go to flea markets and farm auctions whenever I get the chance to hopefully find that amazing million-dollar item I bought for only three dollars!

Thanks for stopping by today Lori! Below are a couple of her books along with the buy links if you want to check them out! 🙂 They’re on sale for $.99!

ForAShortTimeCoverKeri has no idea who she really is anymore. Raised in the Midwest, where catching frogs and shovelling manure is common practice, then spending several adult years traveling the country and hob-nobbing with celebrities and the elite, Keri returns to her roots. She now lives in her sister`s basement, wondering just who she really is anymore. After a peculiar meeting with the Quinn cousins, Keith and Jeremy, Keri is determined to capture Keith`s attention. An actor, a tall, compelling man, elusive, even abrasive at times, Keith is particularly intriguing to a woman like Keri who is accustomed to capturing the heart of any man she`s ever wanted. Yet it was Jeremy, the humble cabinet-maker and owner of a misshapen dog named Scalawag, who leaped into a bon-fire to rescue a scrap of an old coat that had sentimental value for her. Following two episodes with the facial disorder, Bell`s Palsy, and after Jeremy has moved out of state, possibly to run from his heartbreak over her, Keri finally realizes not only who she really is??but who she needs to become. But is it too late?

Amazon:  http://www.amazon.com/For-a-Short-Time-ebook/dp/B003YJEWS0

Barnes and Noble:  http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/for-a-short-time-lori-lapekes/1100410102?ean=9781897562499

Secrets of Catalpa Hall 453x680Melody Moon has returned to her roots with fame and riches in hopes of finding Gideon, the young man with the strange birthmark on his face. Thoughts of him have haunted her for twenty years, yet no one knows what happened to him. After purchasing Catalpa Hall, their childhood sanctuary, Melody makes an unusual discovery: carved in the wood below the old stage in the hall is her name, Gideon’s name, and the current year.Melody and Gideon were once known as the “Double Uglies,” dubbed as such by Melody’s reprehensible older brother, Dean. The cruel nickname later earned Melody fame as an author of children’s books, but only Gideon knows the nickname had actually precipitated dreadfully more—her brother’s drowning long ago. It’s a loss that’s turned Gideon into the recluse he’s
become.What exactly did happen at the secluded pond behind Catalpa Hall when Melody and Gideon were so young and just trying to get by in the backwoods culture…and who else may have witnessed it? Someone with sinister motives is involved, and is desperately attempting to tear Gideon and Melody apart. Gideon’s love for the enchanting young woman he’d been forced to abandon two decades ago may force him to leave her again, for he feels certain Melody could never understand the truth. At least–his perception of the truth.

Amazon:   http://www.amazon.com/Secrets-of-Catalpa-Hall-ebook/dp/B007WYPIGS

Barnes and Noble: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/secrets-of-catalpa-hall-lori-lapekes/1110362265?ean=2940014565875

 

****Sorry everyone! I don’t know why I can’t get the links to work! I’ve copied them over a couple of times! Grrrr….

Posted in promotion

An Anniversary Thank You!

Hello Everyone! I hope all is well with you! This month marks the one year anniversary of my first book “The Super Spies and the Cat Lady Killer”.  It hit Amazon on the 13th of March last year and I’ve learned a lot this first year of publication.

The main thing I’ve learned is that there is a lot of support from other authors in the publication arena.  And I’d like to take a moment and thank some of them for their support. They have been there for me when I’ve had questions or concerns. They’ve shared their knowledge with me, whether it was an editorial opinion or some marketing knowledge, I’ve grown as a result of their feedback.   I’d like to take a moment and send them a huge “THANK YOU” and if you get a chance check out their books, you might find something you’ll really like. 🙂 I know I have. 🙂

Rachel VanDyken:

Pull (A Seaside Novel Book 2)Jaded rock star, Demetri Daniels, is in Hell — also known as Seaside, Oregon. Sent to rehab after nearly getting himself killed last year, his record company wants nothing more than for him to lay low, away from the limelight.

Irritated and more alone than he’s ever been in his life, Demetri tries desperately to rebuild his shattered reputation as a drug addict and player, which proves to be difficult when he meets Alyssa.

Alyssa is everything he should stay away from. She’s beautiful, smart, but above all else, she’s damaged. And one thing Demetri has learned is two broken hearts don’t equal a whole.
In the end, he has to decide if he can rise above the life he’s created in learning from his past mistakes, or fall into the darkness of his choices.

**This is a New Adult Novel..minor language, drug usage, and sexual situations. Not appropriate for younger readers**

Barnes and Noble:  http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/pull-rachel-van-dyken/1114720164?ean=2940016376530

Kay Springsteen Tate:

Abiding Echoes (Echoes of Orson's Folly)Love is family…The McGee family is devastated when their beloved patriarch, Justin, suffers a heart attack. Having lost their mother too soon, Ryan and Sean can only pray for their father’s recovery.Love is endless…Justin knows how much his children love and need him, but he’s tired and they have families of their own now. Watching his sons with their wives is bittersweet for him, because it makes him miss his beloved Beth all the more. Not a day goes by when he doesn’t think about her… want to be with her.Love is timeless…And suddenly, she’s there. With him, beside him in some strange way he doesn’t understand. But speaking and reminiscing with her about the day they met and how they fell in love seems more real than the heartbroken family holding vigil at his bedside.Love is abiding…Justin’s love for Beth has only strengthened over their years apart and he’s longed for the time when he’d see her again. Finally, that time is here. Who has the greater claim on him, his family… his grandchildren… or the love of his life?
Amazon:  http://www.amazon.com/Abiding-Echoes-Orsons-Folly-ebook/dp/B008MRR876
Barnes and Noble:  http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/abiding-echoes-kay-springsteen/1112162718?ean=2940014969529
Lori Lapekes:
Secrets of Catalpa HallMelody Moon has returned to her roots with fame and riches in hopes of finding Gideon, the young man with the strange birthmark on his face. Thoughts of him have haunted her for twenty years, yet no one knows what happened to him. After purchasing Catalpa Hall, their childhood sanctuary, Melody makes an unusual discovery: carved in the wood below the old stage in the hall is her name, Gideon’s name, and the current year.Melody and Gideon were once known as the “Double Uglies,” dubbed as such by Melody’s reprehensible older brother, Dean. The cruel nickname later earned Melody fame as an author of children’s books, but only Gideon knows the nickname had actually precipitated dreadfully more—her brother’s drowning long ago. It’s a loss that’s turned Gideon into the recluse he’s
become.What exactly did happen at the secluded pond behind Catalpa Hall when Melody and Gideon were so young and just trying to get by in the backwoods culture…and who else may have witnessed it? Someone with sinister motives is involved, and is desperately attempting to tear Gideon and Melody apart. Gideon’s love for the enchanting young woman he’d been forced to abandon two decades ago may force him to leave her again, for he feels certain Melody could never understand the truth. At least–his perception of the truth.
Barnes and Noble:  http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/secrets-of-catalpa-hall-lori-lapekes/1110362265?ean=2940014565875
Sharon Ledwith:

The Last Timekeepers and the Arch of AtlantisWhen Amanda Sault and her four classmates are caught in a major food fight at school, they are given the choice of suspension or yard duty. It was a no-brainer. A two-week crash course in landscaping leads the kids to discover a weathered stone arch buried in an overgrown backyard. Instead of a forgotten lawn ornament, it turns out to be an ancient time portal from the lost continent of Atlantis. Chosen by an Atlantean Magus to be Timekeepers—legendary time travelers sworn to keep history safe from an evil force—the five children, along with two offbeat adults, are sent on the adventure of their lives to save the Earth from an uncertain future. The Timekeepers’ first mission lands them in England in 1214, where they must find an adolescent Robin Hood and his band of merry teens before history is turned upside-down.

Amazon:  http://www.amazon.com/Last-Timekeepers-Arch-Atlantis-ebook/dp/B0084AKSP0

Barnes and Noble: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/the-last-timekeepers-and-the-arch-of-atlantis-x2019-sharon-ledwith/1111074347?ean=2940014363952

Lindsay Downs:

A Body in the Attic (Emily Dahill, CID)A missing soldier. A break in. A former, now soldier, model tells of an aborted assault. A passageway hiding more than years of dust and cobwebs. Rooms where there are none. The reappearance of the mysterious’brown-haired man’. What, if anything, ties these random facts together.
With precision and dedication Emily and Dakota start to unravel some of the questions. Only when an FBI agent steps up do the facts start to merge into what appears to be a terrorist conspiracy.
A body found halfway across the country is the final clue in answering all of the question, but one.
Will Emily be able to save a life before it’s to late?

Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Body-Attic-Emily-Dahill-ebook/dp/B007DOSU3U

Barnes and Noble: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/body-in-the-attic-lindsay-downs/1108890141?ean=2940013998872

Thanks to these wonderful authors! I appreciate your help and guidance you’ve shown me in my first year of publication! 🙂

And if you haven’t picked up your copy of  “The Super Spies and the Cat Lady Killer” you still can! Here are the covers, blurbs, and buy links!

The Super Spies and the Cat Lady KillerThis book opens in a small town in Michigan where fifteen-year-old Sarah Cole is stuck spending the summer at her Aunt and Uncle’s with her sister, Lacey. She’s not happy with the situation until she befriends a girl named Jackie. The three girls stumble upon the ruthless murder of a reclusive neighborhood woman. One of the officers investigating the crime believes the girls are responsible for her death. Fearing that this officer will frame them for the murder, the girls organize their own detective squad. They become the Super Spies and start their own fact-finding mission.  The Super Spies can’t understand why anyone would want to murder the “Cat Lady” until they start digging into her past and discover a horrible crime that happened thirty years ago. They uncover a connection between the two crimes and attempt to bring this information to the police, only to be reprimanded for meddling in the inquest. Not only are the girls upset by the admonition, but they also struggle with the fact that their exuberant investigating could provide a legal loophole allowing the killer to go free. To make matters worse, the police don’t even believe them. Frustrated by this turn of events, the Super Spies realize it’s up to them to snare the Cat Lady killer, or die trying…

Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Super-Spies-Lady-Killer-ebook/dp/B007JZH61K

Barnes and Noble:  http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/the-super-spies-and-the-cat-lady-killer-lisa-orchard/1109518725?ean=2940014338202

Here’s the second book in the Super Spies series!

The Super Spies and the High School BomberThis book opens in a small town in Michigan where Sarah Cole and her sister Lacey are now living with their Aunt and Uncle. Still reeling from the fact her parents have disappeared, Sarah starts the school year with her new friend Jackie Jenkins. When Sarah learns the school has been bombed, she’s filled with dread. Uncle Walt is a teacher, and he was in the school when the bomb exploded. Taking matters into her own hands, Sarah decides to search for him. The rest of the Super Spies are right behind her. When a fireman chases them away from the school, Sarah becomes suspicious. She decides to investigate. The FBI arrives on the scene. Sarah realizes this bombing could have even bigger implications. Searching for the bombers, Sarah is introduced to the world of terrorism. She fears that the bombing and her parents’ disappearance are connected and terrorists are involved. To make matters worse, the bombers are determined to finish the job. Can the Super Spies find the bombers before it’s too late?

Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Super-Spies-School-Bomber-ebook/dp/B008P8O7OY

Barnes and Noble: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/the-super-spies-and-the-high-school-bomber-lisa-orchard/1112263058?ean=2940014992244

Thanks for stopping by!

Posted in Teen

Why Don’t Schools have Relationship Classes?

Hello Everyone! I hope all is well with you today! I’m back after being extremely ill for the last week.  Boo! My whole family had this cold/flu bug that’s been going around, but we’re on the mend this week. Well…enough about that. Today I wanted to talk about teen relationships.

During the teen years there are a lot of firsts. First feelings…first dances…first kisses…etc.  Since this is a period of a lot of first times, there are many new emotions that teens haven’t felt before and therefore are inexperienced in handling.

Because of that inexperience some teens may use controlling or manipulative behavior to try and avoid the painful feelings of rejection.  This is unfortunate but true. This kind of behavior can take teens down a destructive path both for the controller and the teen that’s the object of control.

Now, keep in mind the person who’s attempting to control the situation is not trying to be manipulative in any way…they are trying to avoid the pain of rejection. However, his/her controlling behavior does have a detrimental effect. If the teen who doesn’t want to be in the relationship can’t break out of that controller’s grip, he/she’s in a relationship that is no longer working for them. This is where, in my humble opinion, the relationship becomes unhealthy and could even become abusive.

Unfortunately, I see this in many young adult relationships and as a result there’s decreased self-esteem for both parties involved. So what is the answer? I have one…but you knew that didn’t you? 🙂

I think all teens should have to take “Relationship Classes” or “Relationship Workshops.” That’s right; in my opinion these classes should be a requirement of the school curriculum…just like sex education. 🙂

In these classes we can teach teens what an unhealthy relationship is. We can show them what negative behaviors should not be tolerated.  I feel this is important for our kids. These classes will help them maintain healthy self-esteem; and what better place to learn about relationships than in school next to their peers. 🙂 The same peers they are having relationships with.

We can give them tools to cope with unhealthy situations. One that comes to mind is what can a young girl do when she wants to end a relationship with a young man and he threatens suicide? Or the other way around? These situations have spun out of control and are too much for any teen to handle. An adult has to be involved…but how many teens talk to their parents at this stage of the game? Very few.  I say let’s give them the tools they need, so  they can recognize these unhealthy situations. We could even take it a step further and teach them healthy communication skills. They will be better adults in the long run.

Thanks for stopping by and reading my post. As always, I’m sharing my personal opinion and would love to hear some of your ideas! Please leave a comment; I’d love to hear from you!

Posted in Teen

Let’s raise Internally Oriented Kids! Another tool to help beat Peer Pressure

Hello Everyone, I hope all is well with you. I’m back today talking about teen issues. The issue I’d like to talk about is “External Orientation”. Now, you’re probably wondering what the heck is “External Orientation.”

Well…what I mean by this is when someone looks outside themselves for validation. They are “Externally Oriented”. Why is this a problem? I mean we all need a pat on the back once in a while, right?

I agree a pat on the back is awesome and everyone needs one. However, the problem arises when a teen becomes dependent on others for validation. And I see this more and more in our youth today.

They look to their peers for approval instead of looking inside themselves and asking does this behavior agree with my own belief system? It’s my humble opinion that when a teen acts in a way that is at odds with their belief system the result is lowered self-esteem. And we all know that low self-esteem is at the root of many of the problems in our society today.

We as parents need to teach our children to be more internally oriented. Teens need to work in conjunction with their own belief system and stand up for their own beliefs when they’re challenged by their peers.

So, how do we do this as parents? That is a good question and I have some answers. 🙂 Again, parental involvement is a major factor and it starts years before children reach their teens.

First of all, parents need to help their child develop a realistic belief system and this starts from day one all the way up to adulthood.  I’m talking about moral development not religious beliefs.

I know what you’re saying…yeah…we know that…but how do we do this?

We do this by helping them develop good habits in their childhood. For example, I don’t want my children to abuse alcohol and drugs when they’re older. So, I teach them healthy habits for their body now. I tell them … they shouldn’t do things that are bad for their body, like smoking and drinking. I tell them the negative effects of these vices. I know what you’re thinking…they’re too young…but they’re not. Now is when they’re listening to their parents and if parents can embed this into their sponge-like brains…they will develop the belief that drinking is bad for our bodies therefore, I’m not going to drink.

Is it really this simple? The answer is yes and no. 🙂 It is this simple if parents act in conjunction with what they’re teaching their children.  But problems arise when parents instruct their children one way and then behave in the opposite manner. This confuses the child and when they become teens…if they don’t have a strong belief system in place they’re more likely to look to others for validation. The more they look to others for validation the more likely they will fall prey to outside influences.

Children need to get validation from their parents. If they don’t get it from their parents they will look for it outside the home. It’s that simple. So please give your child praise when they do something right.

Whenever, I catch my kids eating something that’s good for their body. I give them lots of hugs and make a big deal about it. They’ll remember this and when a friend offers them that beer when they’re underage…they’re more likely to turn it down.  Because I’ve taught them that it’s not good for your body.

Being “internally oriented” is a great way to combat the many self-esteem issues that plague our young people today. Of course, this is just my opinion. 🙂 I’d love to hear yours, please leave a comment and share your thoughts.

On a side note, I’d just like to let you know that my books are now available as Audiobooks! So, if you’re interested in listening to them here are the links! 🙂

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http://www.audible.com/pd/ref=sr_1_1?asin=B00BGBSLCG&qid=1362406805&sr=1-1

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http://www.audible.com/pd/ref=sr_1_2?asin=B00BIRIEDO&qid=1362406906&sr=1-2

Thanks for stopping by! 🙂